January 11, 2007

shreds of nothing

it's like studying like you never have before, cramming every little bit you can into that few hours.. all just to salvage the last paper. you fight relentlessly despite exhaustion attacking your body and fatigue burning your eyes. anything, for this one last shot at redemption.

only to scrape through with the lowest marks.

it's like coming home late after work feeling like the world's weight has been lifted off your shoulders. nothing beats the smell of home-made yong tau fu wafting through the air, welcoming you into the cozy haven of comfort. you havent felt so warm in a long time. anticipation whets your appetite.

except you had to face the wrath of the queen first.

it's like trying to still the oncoming waves from crashing onto the beach. being afraid of standing all alone while waiting for the lrt to arrive, and later being worried sick that there might be another reason why he never picked up the phone. to drive yourself crazy inside, sudden fearful thoughts piercing the short-lived calm.

but the cold words that come out of his mouth pierce your heart before anything else.

i guess if you put too much of yourself into anything, it's almost like giving pieces of yourself away.

hope is fragile; too much of it brings you down sometimes.

i thought i could find my strength in you.

i wonder why i never learn.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hope is certainly fragile, but apathy is meaningless.

Take care, David.

Heids said...

hugs, liss..

heids

Anonymous said...

are u ok babes? gonna sms u at a more earthly hour tomorrow. 4.30am now.

Anonymous said...

don't think you never learn, liss dahling, no experience is wasted, merely laying dormant, tucked away for further use, because there's always hope that 'this time, things will be different'. sometimes, they are. *hugs*

-meldee
xoxo

Anonymous said...

sometimes in life there are ups and there are downs...i believe that there is hope in everything and learning is part of life..
Be strong and I know you can make it through....

liss said...

it feels so good knowing that people actually care.
thank you for the kind thoughts.

i am now trying a simpler life of less expectations and demands.

we'll see how it goes.