March 06, 2007

the long walk home

was shorter and warmer than i thought it would be with so many things on my mind.

i feel like bitter rocket leaves and sweet spinach piled on with fermented hard-boiled eggs and tangy tuna. while fighting the strong urge to ramble, my mind flutters all over the place like a newly-freed butterfly.

i feel con-ny.
conflicting thoughts, contrasting personalities. consumed by emotions, connected only to the spread of letters under my fingers. contending with myself, endlessly contradicting my values. unfaltering concern, concealed. i must conform.

im thinking..

coffee, as it once again worked its wonders on me today. such a powerful drug; the tiniest of gulps can make my heart race for no reason at all. for all the tension, the warmth pulsing through my body and my cold hands, i blame the infamous long black. my type, definitely.

AIESEC, and how not a day has passes without indulging in it. how the info sessions can be so enlightening when you finally understand the complex but rewarding concept. how marketing the produt can be so challenging, and entertaining at the same time. how the passion in some is indefatigable- indirectly giving you that extra boost to feel the same. strive in the thick of mess.

change, and how a simple word can warrant completely different realms of understanding to different people. from colourful penang to vibrant bangkok to mind-numbing vacation work to unmatchable indulgences during chinese new year, the whirlwind of feelings have finally come to a standstill upon touchdown at melbourne's tullamarine airport. no matter how unfounded, there is rationale behind my actions that maybe only time can explain. one thing slipped though; it has only just hit me that it was the 5th of march yesterday.

unnecessary stress, of untimely reports and mindless work. of draggy meetings, and unending activities. of the same people, but new faces. the safe haven is barely 10 steps away, but i am 5 days behind. how i long for the comfort of those familiar walls that smile a million different smiles at me, and twinkle like stars at night. the words that are read so many times they remain etched in your mind. the inspirational posters, waiting to be hung up for my viewing pleasure.

it has only been a week, but it feels so much longer.

somewhere inside, there is a pipe leaking.


listen to natalie grant- the real me

7 comments:

revel in me said...

I know I have said ths before, and at the risk of sounding like a broken record, I really like the way you write! I love how you're so creative with your words, really like all the con-ny barricade of words! :D

Anonymous said...

Absence from who we love if worse than death

Kenny said...

"Absence from who we love if worse than death"

i disagree.

What more can you ask if the ones we love are filled with happiness everyday even though we're not beside him/her.

Absence from who we love should not be worse than death its only a little pain caused by distance. can be easily fixed with effort ;) cheer up mate.

Kenny said...

oh yeah by the way.

Keep up the good work liss. It's just awesome that you teaches me all these new vocabs every time i read. =_= i need an english tutor badly

LX said...

i agree with kenny abt new vocab. what the hell does "indefatigable" mean?

great post as usual liss, you should try writing a longer piece, who knows, you might get published one day... ;-)

jb said...

Your blog always puts a smile on my face :).

PS to lx: I think "indefatigable" is derived from the word fatigue, but correct me if I'm wrong :s

liss said...

hehe yes jb, you're right=]